It's a pleasure to be here, Barbara.
The pleasure is all mine.
But I'm wondering.
Yes?
What about God?
I have him penciled in for next week.
What I mean is - won't He be jealous?
About my being first and everything?
I believe you're the one with the jealousy
problem.
That was quite a fall you took. Any bones broken?
Oooooh. Kitten with a whip.
For the purpose of this interview, I'll need something
to call you. 'Lucifer' seems to me rather pretentious.
You may call me 'Scratch.'
An eighteenth century sobriquet - quite
popular during the American Revolution.
Clever, too. I like that in a woman.
Don't get fwesh.
Still having t'wouble with those r's?
Hasn't affected my salary.
Capitalism. I love it.
Step out from the shadows, Scratch.
Let my viewers at home have a look
at you.
I wouldn't want to frighten anyone.
We're on at nine o'clock. It's all right.
Well, if you're sure...
I'm sure.
Hello, Barbara.
Is that the best you can do?
I thought you'd be sickened by my appearance.
I thought you'd run, screaming, from the room.
I've seen Sam Donaldson without makeup.
CONTINUE ON TO